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Best Spam Messages on FilmVerse

One of the banes of our modern existence is spam in our email inbox, but what I’ve learned since maintaining FilmVerse is that spammers also target the comment section of blogs.  Of course, we all had knowledge of this in an academic way thanks to all the Captchas that we have to wade through any time we log on to practically every website.  While WordPress is one of the easier systems, it still has its issues.

WordPress filters out a lot of spam from even reaching the blog, but what does slip by is sent to a special folder so readers won’t ever see these genius compositions, many of which attempt to sound like they are from a real person who read the article, but many times they consist of a random jumble of words that may or may not be English.  The one common component is that there is a website linked (sometimes the entry is filled with links) to an obviously commercial site.  It’s questionable as to why the people (robots?) sending out these messages think that they’ll be successful in fooling others into not only thinking what is written is real, but also to follow the link to the advertised websites and buy their services.  Often the messages sounds complimentary, but are oddly vague in their flattery.

Here is a compilation of some of the best spams sent to FilmVerse with the “author” credited.  The messages are written verbatim, with spelling, grammar, and punctuation errors intact for your reading pleasure (though long rambling nonsensical essays have been omitted).

“In the end the product is one that lends itself to being enjoyed in both a dancing and partying environment or an evening of attentive listening.”
– Measuring The Effectiveness Of Forex Intervention

(It’s great that FilmVerse causes people to dance and party.)

“Gorgeous essay, acquired the enjoyment of studying”
– firma curatenie in constanta

(Who said studying isn’t enjoyable?)

“Perfectly pent subject material , thankyou for information .”
– Lelia Entwisle

(Pent subject matter is exactly what we strive for.)

“Its great to see anyone make postings on this area.”
– Yellow Classic Flower Girl Dress

(Right, because posts about film and TV are so hard to find on the Internet.)

“Sign us up for Sofia Vergara’s diet/exercise regime. Really, you really only CAN do one or the other. At most.”
– Exercises To Get Ripped

(Sofia Vergar’s diet/exercise regime or what?  Give us another choice!)

“it is nice to hear from you and read your information here looks nice. grat job”
– gamani19785

(We strive to do a grat job.)

“Thank you for good post. It was very informative. I like a part about click here a lot”
– life insurance

(Click here is our most popular features.)

“I was reading through some of your blog posts on this site and I conceive this web site is very instructive! Keep posting.”
– SeeCrossgrove

(Glad you finally got instructions on how to conceive.)

“In case a brand-new post becomes available or assuming any changes occur on your site, I would love to read more. Aromatherapy Essential Massage Oil”
– sutra aroma

(Something smells fishy about this message.)

“Thanks for that awesome posting. It saved MUCH time”
– carpet cleaning 91360

(It is the goal of FilmVerse to save people time while reading posts.)

“Can I simply say what a relief to find someone who really knows what theyre speaking about on the internet. You undoubtedly know the way to deliver an issue to gentle and make it important. Extra people have to read this and perceive this aspect of the story. I cant imagine youre not more standard since you positively have the gift.”
– Trenton Ecklund

(Gentle delivery is FilmVerse’s specialty.  Send all your extra people here.  Is standard a compliment or an insult?)

“[Britensure Yellow Teeth] is really a tried and tested safe and effective merchandise that will provide you with some sort of assured eight pigments richer providing you with this confidant look which you have looking on to get.”
– gadaBrard

(Does Britensure cause or prevent yellow teeth?  But hey, we can be eight pigments richer!)

“It is possible to win the lottery on the very first try. You don’t have to mortgage your home to win a few bucks like so many people do. Are you confident that your lottery strategy will work? If you don’t have one, don’t worry about it…. knowing what can go wrong will make it easy for you to win the lottery.
It is also important that you re-invest a portion of your profits into your business! That way, not only will your business continue to grow, but its GROWTH RATE will also increase! This in turn brings in MORE profits, which allows you to invest MORE into your business… Do you see a pattern!?”
– bymnUnrergy

(How many people are mortgaging their homes to play the lottery?  No wonder we’re in a housing crisis.  It’s grat that not only will your business grow, but its growth rate will increase because those are two totally different things.)

“Thanks for another wonderful post. Where else could anybody get that type of information in such an ideal way of writing? I’ve a presentation next week, and I’m on the look for such info.”
– www

(Where indeed.  I can’t wait to see your FilmVerse presentation.)

Skipflyq…

Fantastic blog post, saw on…”
– Snappointq

(Saw on what?  Don’t keep us in suspense!)

“Hi! Quick question that’s totally off topic. Do you know how to make your site mobile friendly? My site looks weird when viewing from my iphone4. I’m trying to find a theme or plugin that might be able to correct this problem. If you have any suggestions, please share. With thanks!”
-- Comprar enlaces en foros

(This one actually looks like it could be legit…)

“Hi! I could have sworn I’ve been to this website before but after reading through some of the post I realized it’s new to me. Nonetheless, I’m definitely happy I found it and I’ll be bookmarking and checking back frequently!”
– Comprar enlaces

(…oh wait, a second message from the same “person”.)

“Have you ever thought about adding a little bit more than just your articles? I mean, what you say is important and everything. Nevertheless imagine if you added some great images or video clips to give your posts more, “pop”! Your content is excellent but with pics and video clips, this site could definitely be one of the best in its field. Excellent blog!”
— Servicios SEO

(And a third, though this time the “name” changed but all other info like URL and IP address was the same.)

“Hey, I think your website might be having browser compatibility issues. When I look at your blog site in Chrome, it looks fine but when opening in Internet Explorer, it has some overlapping. I just wanted to give you a quick heads up! Other then that, excellent blog!”
— Servicios SEO

(This makes number four.)

“Hi there would you mind letting me know which web host you’re working with? I’ve loaded your blog in 3 completely different internet browsers and I must say this blog loads a lot faster then most. Can you suggest a good internet hosting provider at a reasonable price? Many thanks, I appreciate it!”
— Servicios SEO

(The fifth and final message from this robot.  For having such difficulty reading FilmVerse, he sure is persistent.)

“Thank you for you engaging, informative material. I believe many of the views you have mentioned in your article are sound and unique. It’s obvious you are a talented writer.”
— Ejercicios para hacer en casa

(We strive for sound and unique views, as long as it’s not a view of the Brooklyn Bridge, Florida swampland, or Arizona beachfront.)

“I am experiencing an issue with your rss feed . Don’t know why I am not able to subscribe to it. Is there anybody getting identical rss problem? Anybody who knows kindly respond. Thanks”
— gimnasia en casa

(This guy should talk with Servicios SEO.)

“Hey there! This post couldn’t be written any better! Reading this post reminds me of my previous room mate! He always kept chatting about this. I will forward this write-up to him. Pretty sure he will have a good read. Thanks for sharing!”
— Get senuke x

(Which post reminds him of his previous roommate?  One about Star Wars or Star Trek?  The Steven Spielberg quiz?  Screenwriting tips?  The Munsters?  Maybe it was the one about the fake Paul McCartney.)

copyright © 2012 FilmVerse

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6 comments on “Best Spam Messages on FilmVerse

  1. I love this post, i get those comments everyday haha, some are so ridiculously funny :D

  2. Very funny :)
    I got some of them too. Have you ever get a very looooong spam talking about some religion? I got that one few months back and the funny thing is the spam message appeared in all my blogs, I have 3 WP blogs

  3. Ha! Good one, Jamie. Yeah, some of the things that come are pretty unbelievable. Thanks for this and the link love.

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